How do these things happen? Paramount has just announced their December slate of new DVD catalog releases, and would you believe a double bill of... Leo Tolstoy and Johnny Knoxville!?

Hitting shelves on 12/3 is the Tolstoy classic War and Peace, fresh from its recent limited re-release. Presented in its 203-minute entirety, the disc features a new 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen transfer, the original English mono track, and the original and re-release theatrical trailers.

Next we have two more modern classics, also due on 12/3. Ridley Scott's The Duellists marked his feature-film directing debut, and is presented in a brand-new 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen transfer, with remixed English 5.1 and 2.0 Dolby surround tracks plus the original English mono mix, an audio commentary with Scott, an isolated score with additional commentary by composer Howard Blake, the "Dueling Directors: Ridley Scott and Kevin Reynolds" featurette, Scott's first short film "Boy on a Bicycle," three still galleries with photos and storyboards, and the original theatrical trailer. Sidney Lumet's Serpico is also getting the special edition treatment, with a new 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen transfer and English 5.1 Dolby Digital remix, plus English and French mono mixes, the "Serpico: From Real to Reel" and "Inside Serpico" featurettes, a "Serpico Favorite Moments" montage, still gallery with commentary by Lumet, and the theatrical trailer. Retail is $24.95 each.

Rounding out Paramount's December slate are three new MTV releases, all due on 12/10. Charles Dickens' classic holiday "A Christmas Carol" gets a "sassy musical update" in the abomination A Diva's Christmas Carol. Presented in 4:3 full screen with English 5.1 and 2.0 soundtracks, retail is $29.95. And for you fans of stupid human tricks, don't miss Jackass Volume 2 and Volume 3, each of which include 40 skits from MTV's inexplicably popular "reality show" featuring dumb people doing even dumber things. Ouch! Retail is $19.99 a pop, or $39.99 for a double-pack.

Flowers for Harrison - 12:00am

Despite a high-profile cast including Andie MacDowell and Adrien Brody, acclaimed director Elie Chouraqui's war drama Harrison's Flowers failed to attract much attention during its brief theatrical run last spring. Debuting on 12/23 from Universal, this bare bones release includes a 2.35:1 anamorphic widescreen transfer, English 5.1 and Spanish 2.0 Dolby surround tracks, production notes, and the trailer. Retail is $32.95.